Well, it was only a wee stroke
Sorry, this is a long read...
When I was 34, I was working full time in a promoted post in a Scottish school. As well as teaching full time, I was directing the school shows. Taking groups of kids to France every summer. Marking exam papers every year for the Scottish Exam Board. Running night classes in French for adults through the winter. Going to yoga class. Learning Gaelic.
And suddenly, it all came to a halt: one day I lost the power of my right side. My right hand shook (still does, in fact). My right knee gave way a lot. My right eye began to droop and the eyeball disappeared down into my cheek. My speech was hesitant. (Bad news if you're a teacher).
I was referred to a hospital in Glasgow. Within 5 minutes of my arrival, the registrar told me I was in the wrong place and would have to go to a different hospital, where they dealt with neurological problems. He phoned a pal. I got a taxi there and was admitted. The next few days are a blur - lots of tests, lumbar punctures (not nice) and one amazing test where my right side started to shake within seconds of it starting and I was told by the medic in charge to 'Lie still!' If only I could, pal! I ended up in an operating theatre having dye injected from my groin to my brain. I immediately had a migraine, lost my speech and was unconscious for a while.
But finally, I had my diagnosis: I'd had a stroke - 'only a wee stroke,' according to the consultant. I so wanted to ask him if he'd ever had one and knew the difference between a 'big' stroke and a 'wee' stroke. I had a visit from a neurosurgeon who told me there was nothing to be done: I had a cluster of 'incomplete arteries' in my brain. No operation. What was the prognosis? He shrugged.
Of course, at least I had a house and a job. I went home, slept a lot, had bad headaches and was sick quite often, fell a lot. I had a visit from the depute in my school: when did I plan to come back to work? I left the room to be sick at one point but came back and said I would try working 10-2 every day from the next week onwards. Back at work, the headteacher watched me walk along a corridor and commented I seemed to be 'listing' to one side. I explained I had had a stroke. She didn't react.
My best pal left the school. I felt very alone. Then I realised there were children in my family I didn't know. A year later I left. Back to Glasgow, where I had a great support team in my family - rather than a brilliant physio and a couple of decent colleagues back where I had been.
I thought all this was a one-off. I never imagined it was happening to other people back then - or that it could still be happening now. Then I came across this article in the Guardian and realised there's worse than what happened to me - and it's happening now:
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2019/oct/26/benefit-assessor-more-afraid-state-poverty?CMP=fb_gu&utm_medium=Social&utm_source=Facebook&fbclid=IwAR3T4P6XloRL3_7-jOCV_5XyU2KV3TajjbQb38VzBdVFy66hGJcs5mGz90U#Echobox=1572077890
It's hard to work out how other people see the disabled: do able-bodied people imagine that while they are hard-working the disabled are a bunch of lazy, useless spongers? Do the able-bodied really not know anyone who is physically or mentally disabled? Do they think illness or disability will never happen to them? Do the Conservative Party live in a world where everyone is healthy, no one ever gets ill or, if they do, they can afford private medical care and have enough savings to see them through the rest of their lives without any kind of support?
For most of us, that just isn't the case. That's why we pay into National Insurance and income tax. The NHS and social care in Scotland are - or should be - our guarantee that we won't end up, like my 4 times great grandmother, in the St Leonard's poor house in Leith because none of her 9 children could look after her. Should I, having paid in from the age of 15, have been refused medical treatment? Even though the treatment when I was 35 allowed me to go on working as a teacher and the NHS saw my weakened immune system through an attack of Guilain-Barre 10 years later?
The action of the Tory government that I can't tolerate - and I think we as a community should not tolerate it - is the introduction of the profit motive into health and social care. Why do 'healthcare' companies love being involved in care, especially 'end of life' care? Because the profits are huge. It's not that a lot of us have large amounts of cash to spend but we will sell our houses and our kids will chuck in whatever funding they can for elderly care.
It's the worst kind of exploitation.
How do we fight back? If you live in England, get rid of the Tories. If you live in Wales, get rid of the Labour party - unless you can suggest what good they have done your community. If you live in Scotland, vote for a party that supports independence: SNP or Green or SSP.
When I was 34, I was working full time in a promoted post in a Scottish school. As well as teaching full time, I was directing the school shows. Taking groups of kids to France every summer. Marking exam papers every year for the Scottish Exam Board. Running night classes in French for adults through the winter. Going to yoga class. Learning Gaelic.
And suddenly, it all came to a halt: one day I lost the power of my right side. My right hand shook (still does, in fact). My right knee gave way a lot. My right eye began to droop and the eyeball disappeared down into my cheek. My speech was hesitant. (Bad news if you're a teacher).
I was referred to a hospital in Glasgow. Within 5 minutes of my arrival, the registrar told me I was in the wrong place and would have to go to a different hospital, where they dealt with neurological problems. He phoned a pal. I got a taxi there and was admitted. The next few days are a blur - lots of tests, lumbar punctures (not nice) and one amazing test where my right side started to shake within seconds of it starting and I was told by the medic in charge to 'Lie still!' If only I could, pal! I ended up in an operating theatre having dye injected from my groin to my brain. I immediately had a migraine, lost my speech and was unconscious for a while.
But finally, I had my diagnosis: I'd had a stroke - 'only a wee stroke,' according to the consultant. I so wanted to ask him if he'd ever had one and knew the difference between a 'big' stroke and a 'wee' stroke. I had a visit from a neurosurgeon who told me there was nothing to be done: I had a cluster of 'incomplete arteries' in my brain. No operation. What was the prognosis? He shrugged.
Of course, at least I had a house and a job. I went home, slept a lot, had bad headaches and was sick quite often, fell a lot. I had a visit from the depute in my school: when did I plan to come back to work? I left the room to be sick at one point but came back and said I would try working 10-2 every day from the next week onwards. Back at work, the headteacher watched me walk along a corridor and commented I seemed to be 'listing' to one side. I explained I had had a stroke. She didn't react.
My best pal left the school. I felt very alone. Then I realised there were children in my family I didn't know. A year later I left. Back to Glasgow, where I had a great support team in my family - rather than a brilliant physio and a couple of decent colleagues back where I had been.
I thought all this was a one-off. I never imagined it was happening to other people back then - or that it could still be happening now. Then I came across this article in the Guardian and realised there's worse than what happened to me - and it's happening now:
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2019/oct/26/benefit-assessor-more-afraid-state-poverty?CMP=fb_gu&utm_medium=Social&utm_source=Facebook&fbclid=IwAR3T4P6XloRL3_7-jOCV_5XyU2KV3TajjbQb38VzBdVFy66hGJcs5mGz90U#Echobox=1572077890
It's hard to work out how other people see the disabled: do able-bodied people imagine that while they are hard-working the disabled are a bunch of lazy, useless spongers? Do the able-bodied really not know anyone who is physically or mentally disabled? Do they think illness or disability will never happen to them? Do the Conservative Party live in a world where everyone is healthy, no one ever gets ill or, if they do, they can afford private medical care and have enough savings to see them through the rest of their lives without any kind of support?
For most of us, that just isn't the case. That's why we pay into National Insurance and income tax. The NHS and social care in Scotland are - or should be - our guarantee that we won't end up, like my 4 times great grandmother, in the St Leonard's poor house in Leith because none of her 9 children could look after her. Should I, having paid in from the age of 15, have been refused medical treatment? Even though the treatment when I was 35 allowed me to go on working as a teacher and the NHS saw my weakened immune system through an attack of Guilain-Barre 10 years later?
The action of the Tory government that I can't tolerate - and I think we as a community should not tolerate it - is the introduction of the profit motive into health and social care. Why do 'healthcare' companies love being involved in care, especially 'end of life' care? Because the profits are huge. It's not that a lot of us have large amounts of cash to spend but we will sell our houses and our kids will chuck in whatever funding they can for elderly care.
It's the worst kind of exploitation.
How do we fight back? If you live in England, get rid of the Tories. If you live in Wales, get rid of the Labour party - unless you can suggest what good they have done your community. If you live in Scotland, vote for a party that supports independence: SNP or Green or SSP.
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